Sex Toys And Bunga Bunga: A Brief History Of Military Pranks
Warning: this article contains graphic content, explicit language and ALL the bants
Warning: this article contains graphic content and explicit language.
A sex toy has been attached to a British Army building as part of a prank and of course, thanks to the internet, we didn't miss a minute of it.
The hilarious video, the authenticity of which has not been verified, has certainly captured the attention of the internet with many innuendos being flung around in response so join us below on a journey through some of Britain's finest military pranks.
It shows soldiers attempting to knock the adult toy off using what is essentially a massive poking device. Wonder if they learned how to make that in basic training?
At one point the soldiers are just flicking it about which, as you can imagine, makes everyone crack into laughter with one voice saying:
"It's like a ******* game at the circus."
When asked for an official statement about the adult toy the Ministry Of Defence declined to comment.
Someone has glued a dildo to the kings royal hussar regimental headquarters and the infrastructure company that manage it say its not a priority so it will be attended to in 40 days pic.twitter.com/KCgmtRaIXL
You can see the moment the offending item was carefully removed from the building, rumoured to be the Kings Royal Hussar Regimental Headquarters, in the video below.
We think the addition of the theme song to James Cameron's blockbuster film Titanic adds a certain level of class to the proceedings.
Once the man tasked with taking the dildo off the building has succeeded he wobbles it in his face like a fish trying to escape the hands of its capture.
One bystander off-camera shouts "don't forget the base".
Someone finally came to remove the dildo from the regiment HQ and I’ve been sent a video with the titanic theme dubbed over the top and I am finding this far too funny ‘don’t forget the base!’ pic.twitter.com/6OK7O9YV5u
The military and pranks go hand in hand. You rarely get one without the other. It's one of the ways guys and girls in the military entertain themselves during downtime.
Below we take a look at some other classic military pranks. Any of these familiar to you?
Scare Cam Soldiers
In the clip below the victim of the scare cam prank gets surprised 14 times in the space of 51 seconds. That's a scream every 3.6 seconds which we think deserves a round of applause to whoever edited it.
The prankster himself appears 12 seconds in looking very pleased with himself and continues to surprise his mate, even when he's in the shower and asleep. Is nowhere safe for this guy?
And just a warning, the clip below contains FULL FRONTAL NUDITY and swearing.
"What Does That Smell Of To You?"
On October 13, 2016, the bants train arrived in Blandford during a Great British Bake Off event with a military twist.
Three Physical Training Instructors (PTIs) set up the guy on the left in the video below to end up feeling like he had a soggy bottom by encouraging him to smell the cake just so they could smash his face into it.
"What does that smell of to you?"
The guy senses that something is up and asks... "what are you going to do?" but falls for the oldest trick in the book when the other PTIs bend down to smell the cake which puts his mind at ease.
It wouldn't surprise us if the soldier who ended up with cake on his face and a small dent in his pride ended up being crated, the military tradition of telling someone they need to buy a crate of beers if they appear on TV or online.
The Dreadnought Hoax
One of the most famous practical jokes in British military history took place on February 7, 1910.
Eccentric prankster Horace de Vere Cole and his motley crew of writers and artists which included writer Virginia Woolf decided to answer a request from his friend - an officer aboard HMS Hawke - to hoax their fierce rivals on battleship HMS Dreadnought.
Virginia later explained:
"The officers of the Hawke and the Dreadnought had a feud. ... And Cole's friend who was on the Hawke had come to Cole, and said to him, 'You're a great hand at hoaxing people; couldn't you do something to pull the leg of the Dreadnought?"
With the help of Willy Clarkson who was a theatrical costume designer, Cole and his friends disguised themselves as the Abyssinian royal family to fool the Captain, crew and Commander-in-chief of the battleship HMS Dreadnought.
The ‘Prince of Abyssinia’ and his entourage were received with full ceremonial pomp on the deck of the Royal Navy flagship, with sailors standing to attention to receive royalty.
The Abyssinian party acknowledged the greeting with bows as they shuffled onto the ship, dressed in their long, flowing robes, and for the next forty minutes the Commander gave them a guided tour of the vessel.
Famously the ‘Abyssinians’ murmured "Bunga, Bunga" in appreciation.
During the First World War, HMS Dreadnought became the first battleship to have sank a submarine when it rammed the German SM U-29.
Retired Royal Navy captain Jack Broome wrote in his book ‘Mark Another Signal’ that among the telegrams of congratulation was one that read "BUNGA BUNGA".
Dummy Tanks: How Winston Churchill Pranked Hitler
To fool the Germans into thinking we had more tanks than we actually did, inflatable decoy tanks, yes you read that correctly, were deployed.
This genius deception plan, codenamed Operation Fortitude, was to draw attention away from Normandy in preparation for D-Day.
Spidey Sense Fail
When we asked our digital team if they knew of any military pranks spiders came up immediately. Apparently, these pranks actually happened, oh the horror.
"Throwing a camel spider into the watchtower in Afghan and then removing the ladder so the guy can't get down."
"Throwing a spider into a tent in Belize and zipping it up behind a soldier, he was running in that tent like a hamster in those wheels"
What's with throwing spiders around? Why would anyone do that? Seriously, how would you recover from something like that? And breathe...
As a reward for getting through those spider prank stories here's a picture of a puppy dressed as a superhero on a skateboard. You're welcome.
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